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Have You Been Double Crossed Today?

more funny hate mail

From: Jonathan | motleycow@hotmail.com | IP: 24.193.178.42

Luke,

As you’re no longer a priest, you’re Luke to me.

This half-assed Bukowski crap is trite. Bukowski, the man, was but an o.k. writer, though one hell of a drunk.

Give us some real meat. Only the Hawaiians are satisfied with spam.

And finally, a suggestion. To establish yourself as truly ‘underground,’ you’ve got to start manufacturing the occasional trist with a whore. It will do wonders for your image, and as “‘personal” truths are all the rage, it just may result in some simulation of the petite mort you seem to so desperately seek.

jonathan

P.S. You reveal your self in adopting comment moderation. I believed that only blogging memoirists resorted to such cowardice. Apparently not.

and…

From: jonathan | motleycow@hotmail.com | IP: 24.193.178.42

Luke,

My “life has changed forever”? Was it coke or booze that gave you the courage to write this shit?

For you information, Jennifer was never “stalked,” she was outed for her mendacity. Something about being revealed as having duped Oprah and thousands of others with her tales of abandonment rubbed her the wrong way. Therefore I was suddenly an “abuser,” a “stalker.”

Your rant is amusing, and well illustrates how it is that you’re one of only seven known males known to have actually bought into Jennifer’s bullshit.

For your information, a single communication does not rate as a “stalking.” You truly are soul-mate material for the likes of Lauck. As well, criticism is not abuse so long as it realistically describes specific truths. Some (the honest) even realize such evaluations to be constructive.

And before I go, why is it you didn’t post my communication? Why not expose me to the world, expose me for the “scum bag” you damn me as being? You could have done so by making available my words for all to read. What are you afraid of Luke?

jonathan

P.S. You’ll still need a few more communications before the whine of being “stalked” can begin to gain traction. Cheers!

- -
Okay,
Father Luke

Filed under: I've always wanted to visit Tokyo — Written by Father Luke at 7:13 am on Monday, August 20th, 2007

8 Comments »

Jack goes like this...

Monday, August 20th, 2007

I’m offended he brought Bukowski in as a comparison. Everyone knows that Buk had too much style to ever write a ‘blog’.

melanie goes like this...

Monday, August 20th, 2007

wonder if he carries his soapbox with him when he travels, or if he has a step ladder. thanks for polluting my mind with another man’s piss and dribble. lol

what the world needs now, is love sweet love… :whistle:

HA!

Lisa goes like this...

Tuesday, August 21st, 2007

Jonathan bags my groceries. He’s an angry soul. He did, however, inform me that Ralphs makes a mean pastrami.

Artists are dorks. My opinion only.

Jonathan goes like this...

Wednesday, August 22nd, 2007

Luke,

Just when I think I’ve met with a total coward, you go and prove me wrong. Cool!

But you’ve got to know that Jenny is less than happy at your forthrightness. She’s less than inclined to have mentioned her particular mendacity. So she lied and fabricated that which bought her an “E” ticket to Oprah’s couch. Ah well, we all screw up in one way or another.

I’ve more respect for you than before. Continue to impress me, and maybe, just maybe, your life will be changed forever.

Fondly,

jonathan

Nan G goes like this...

Wednesday, August 22nd, 2007

So who’s this Johnahan? Is he the guy you’re saying is a stalker? I’m trying to play along at home, but I guess I need a scorecard.

Father Luke goes like this:

Now, just who in the fuck are you?

- -
Okay,
Father Luke

Nan G goes like this...

Thursday, August 23rd, 2007

Ewww. Do you have to get all gooey sentimental sickly sweet like that?

I’m Nancy. I live next door. Be nice to me or next time you’re flat unconscious I’ll call 911 and make sure they revive your pasty ass. Ha! That’ll teach ya!

Now I’m asking real lady-like, once again: Who is Jonathan, who is Jennifer, who is stalker #1, who is stalker #2, and what’s the psychodrama-in-progress?

Father Luke goes like this:

No really. Who in the fuck are you?

Next door is a vacant room on one side. On the other is a hoople head too fucked up to know how to get out of his apartment. Across from me is the garbage. Next to that is the elevator. You do not live next door.

If you’re going to be funny, you’ll just have to do your homework.

If you care to discuss it, come over tonight after five, and suck my cock. I’ll tell you all about it when I blowing my load in your mouth.

- -
Okay,
Father Luke

jonathan goes like this...

Friday, August 24th, 2007

Yo Cunt,

Father Luke goes like this:

Yo back.

Are you so simple?
Me so horny, Charlie. Me so horny.

Woah! You listed my IP address. God, what may be next?
Publishing your comments for the world to see?

What an idiot. Dude, if you want to know where I live, just ask. It’s that easy.
Where do you live?

And by the way, motleycow@hotmail.com is a junk account. It’s what I supply to assholes when they need a means to contact me. So go ahead and hack the site. No one care, you moron.
wHaT id you emale adwess?

Do like your ipod, though why supplant Joaquin Pheonix for Johnny Cash? Isn’t that like replacing Dashiell Hammett with the likes of, oh, Father Luke, or would that be Lauck?
Yo back

By the way, when you’ve finished with “blowing a load in her throat” and “blowing a load up her ass”

I don’t do back doors. Not since you licked your Daddy’s shit off my dick.
R e m e m b e r?

where do you bury what’s left of the body?
Like it or not, you fit the profile.

Yo back

Pas de deux?

jonathan

Σοφός επάνω.
- -
Εντάξει,
πατέρας Luke

jonathan goes like this...

Thursday, August 30th, 2007

Wow!,

$50,000.00 and you go silent? Yo, what’s up? $50,000.00 and no response, so what’s up? Are you that large?

Father Luke goes like this:

Yes. I am that large. I recently gave up $70,000.

For a guy who insists that he is up on the facts, you sure miss a lot, don’t you?

My Primary impression of you is that you are a Liar.

The second impression I have of you is that you like to get
drunk, and visit blogs.

Pitiful man, if I can call you such?

Spending too much time with the beg bugs? Is that your satisfaction? Oh, to be punctured by parasites. Wouldn’t it be grand if some idiot would profit you for such equality?

C’mon dude, you counterculture mofo, take the bait. Yo dude, $50,000.00 just for exposing me for the asshole you suggest I am? What’s the problem, you loser?

Or is the long haul more inviting?

What a cunt!

Mr. Lantry:
I have no problem with deleting, and banning users.

I treat my blog like a gathering in my home. Discussion is great, but I have no time for liars in my living room. Spill that shit somewhere else.

I set the rules here, funny boy.
So dance.

Let me set the tune for you.

Tell Deb I say hey.
She must need such reassurance, poor thing.

(Back of my hand to my forehead)

jonathan

- -
Okay,
Father Luke

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